Lois Griffin Quotes (33 - 40 out of 117)

Lois is hot even though she has a sandwich for a nose. She comes from a rich family and married Peter for his free spirit and not his studly good looks as often rumored. Lois can whoop ass when needed and loves her family. Way cooler than Marge.

Lois: Peter, did you paste a new picture of yourself on our wedding picture?
Peter: Yeah I think it looks better.
Lois: You pasted it over me.
Peter: Yeah I think it looks better.
Quote Rating: 8.9 outta 10 (Over 393 votes) - Vote Now!

Joe: Maybe Peter took the trophy, he wanted it all along.
Peter: I couldn't have taken it, I was too busy breakin' into Joe's garage stealin' his ladder so I could steal the trophy tonight!
Lois: Peter!
Peter: What? It's a ladder, he can't use it. It's like takin' a watch off a dead guy.
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 139 votes) - Vote Now!

Lois (to Stewie): Come on sweetie, eat your broccoli. It's good for you! Here comes the airplane!
Stewie (to Lois): Damn you, damn the broccoli, and damn the Wright Brothers!
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 198 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: Can't we tell them that your mother died?
Lois: Peter, I'm not gonna lie about something like that.
Peter: All right, all right, I'll kill your mother.
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 307 votes) - Vote Now!

Lois: A flight attendant? Wow, that does sound exciting. What made you change your mind?
Peter: Just my desire to see you happy.
Lois: Aww .... (hugs peter)
Peter: And to exploit your hard labour for free travel and fun.
Lois: What?
Peter: Shhh ... I didn't say anything. Go to sleep crazy lady.
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 383 votes) - Vote Now!

[Peter has bought a sexy version of a relationship tape]
Lois: $49.95? Are you sure we can afford this?
Peter: Lois, our relationship can not be measured in nipples and dimes ... nickels and boobs ... money.
[runs off]
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 487 votes) - Vote Now!

(Lois reading Meg's diary with the rest of the family gathered around)
Lois: Dear Diary, Kevin is so hot. Today he was raking the yard. God I wish he'd throw me into that pile of leaves. (Laughter)
Meg: (Walks into the room) Hey what's everyone... Oh my God! You're reading my diary! I HATE YOU ALL! WHAAAAAAA! (Runs away crying)
Peter: (Opens beer) Keep going!
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 92 votes) - Vote Now!

(Lois and Peter watching a beer commercial containing two women rubbing tanning oil on each other.)
Lois: Typical male fantasy, women drinking beer. A man must have made that commercial.
Peter: Of course a man made it. It's a commercial, not a delicious Thanksgiving dinner.
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 77 votes) - Vote Now!