Peter Griffin Quotes (129 - 136 out of 362)

Peter is the head of the Griffin family household. He is one of the most typical males imaginable. He's fat, loves Pawtucket Beer, and is always there for some good physical comedy. Peter used to work at a toy factory and now we're just not sure what he does...

(Lois reading Meg's diary with the rest of the family gathered around)
Lois: Dear Diary, Kevin is so hot. Today he was raking the yard. God I wish he'd throw me into that pile of leaves. (Laughter)
Meg: (Walks into the room) Hey what's everyone... Oh my God! You're reading my diary! I HATE YOU ALL! WHAAAAAAA! (Runs away crying)
Peter: (Opens beer) Keep going!
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 92 votes) - Vote Now!

(Lois and Peter watching a beer commercial containing two women rubbing tanning oil on each other.)
Lois: Typical male fantasy, women drinking beer. A man must have made that commercial.
Peter: Of course a man made it. It's a commercial, not a delicious Thanksgiving dinner.
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 77 votes) - Vote Now!

(In the middle of the night, Peter wakes the whole neighborhood by yelling.)
Peter: Hey everybody! Meg just had her first period!
Joe: PETER! Shut up its three in the morning!
Cleveland: What the hell is going on out there?!
Quagmire: Damn it! People are trying to sleep!
Peter: I'm just saying! I'm proud of her. She's a woman! Yea!
Quagmire: Yes, Peter, that's very hot, and I'll deal with it in the morning, but right now, I am exhausted!
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 213 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: Oh this is almost as intense as that time I forgot how to sit down!
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 255 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: What are you gonna make me do? Whack a guy? Off a guy? Whack off a guy? 'Cause I'm married.
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Petern: Chris is not as smart as you think he is...
(Peter slaps Chris in the back of the head)
Chris: HEY!
Peter: He did it.
(Peter points to a nearby floor lamp, and Chris attacks it and starts fighting with it.)
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 171 votes) - Vote Now!

(Lois comes in through door)
Lois: Hi, Boys.
Peter: I didn' have my hand down my pants!
Lois: Hmm...Good for you. I just bought use some new sheets at Bed, Bath, and Beyond.
Peter: Oh boy, I hope you stayed away from that "beyond" section.
(Cuts to scene where Peter is pushing a shopping cart into a door labeled "BEYOND."
Peter: (Swirling through vortex) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh-- Oh, here are the coffee mugs...
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 257 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: Now kids, Daddy only drank so the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off.
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 436 votes) - Vote Now!