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Peter Griffin Quotes (145 - 152 out of 362)

Peter is the head of the Griffin family household. He is one of the most typical males imaginable. He's fat, loves Pawtucket Beer, and is always there for some good physical comedy. Peter used to work at a toy factory and now we're just not sure what he does...

Lois (to counselor): This is the first act of violence Stewie has ever done.
Stewie: Well actually, the first act of violence was the time bomb I left ticking in your uterus before I came out. Happy 50th birthday Lois!
Quote Rating: 8.7 outta 10 (Over 288 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: First of all Bonnie, you've been pregnant for like 6 years! Are you gonna have the baby or not?
Quote Rating: 8.7 outta 10 (Over 251 votes) - Vote Now!

Doctor: Wait a minute, Brian, you have a pre-existing relationship with this degenerate?
Peter: A degenerate, am I? Well you are a festizio! See, I can make up words too, sister.
Quote Rating: 8.7 outta 10 (Over 141 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter (runs to picketers bearing signs that say "Free Tibet"): Free Tibet! I'll take it! (Runs to phone booth.) Hello, China? I think I have something you may want, but it's gonna cost you....that's right--all the tea.
Quote Rating: 8.7 outta 10 (Over 196 votes) - Vote Now!

Lois: It's geat they picked your theme, but isn't it a little esoteric?
Peter: Esoteric?
(Zoom in to the guys in Peter's brain)
Guy1: Could it mean sexy?
Guy2: I think it's a science term.
Guy3: Fellas, fellas! Esoteric means delicious!
(back to the real world)
Peter: Lois, "Who's the Boss" is not a food.
Brian: Swing and a miss.
Quote Rating: 8.7 outta 10 (Over 108 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: Woah! Is that really the blood of Christ?
Priest: Yes.
Peter: Man, that guy must have been wasted 24 hours a day, huh?
Quote Rating: 8.7 outta 10 (Over 465 votes) - Vote Now!

Chris: Hey, dad, look! I covered my back with honey and now the ants are taking me home.
Peter: He does the same thing at home with Velveeta and cockroaches. If you turn the light on really fast they slam him right into the fridge.
Quote Rating: 8.7 outta 10 (Over 340 votes) - Vote Now!

Death: You can't tell anyone that I'm here. For if you do, the consequences could be dire.
Peter: Go on ...
Death: That's it.
[to Lois]
Death: God, what do you see in him?
Quote Rating: 8.7 outta 10 (Over 416 votes) - Vote Now!

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