Peter Griffin Quotes (185 - 192 out of 362)
Peter is the head of the Griffin family household. He is one of the most typical males imaginable. He's fat, loves Pawtucket Beer, and is always there for some good physical comedy. Peter used to work at a toy factory and now we're just not sure what he does...
Peter: Lois, I'm gonna grow a beard.
Lois: Peter, you know I hate beards ...
Peter: No no Lois, it's time I joined the ranks of great men with beards. Why do you think Jesus Christ was so popular? Cause ... cause of all the magic tricks?
Quote Rating:
8.5 outta 10 (Over 875 votes)
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Lois Griffin: This can be a great opportunity for you and Stewie to bond.
Peter Griffin: Bond ... James Bond. I'll do it.
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8.5 outta 10 (Over 373 votes)
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Lois: What did I tell you?
Peter: You told me not to drink at the stag party.
Lois: and what did you do?
Peter: I drank at the sta- Whoa... I almost fell right into that one!
Quote Rating:
8.5 outta 10 (Over 121 votes)
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Peter: I'd like to propose a toast to our neighbors. Sure they might be black, handicapped, and a heartless sex hound, but hey, if they moved out some smelly Hawaiians might move in.
Quote Rating:
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Peter: Oh! Doesn't he just make you so mad that you wanna go down there and hit him?
Cleveland: No.
Peter: Well maybe not him 'cause he's kinda big. But don't you wanna hit the guy sittin' next to ya? Well not him 'cause he's kinda big too. But don't you wanna hit his kid?
(punches kid)
Peter: Take that Macho Man Randy Savage. Ya jerk!
Quote Rating:
8.5 outta 10 (Over 131 votes)
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Cleveland: Thanks for including my Civil Rights boardgame in the game night rotation guys.
Lois: Oh, we're always happy to play "Two Decades of Dignity." It makes us all feel a little less guilty.
(Peter rolls dice and moves his gamepiece.)
Peter (reading off a gamecard): For whistling at a white woman, go directly to jail. Aww, man doesn't anyone ever win at this game?
Cleveland: You don't win. You just do a little better each time.
Quote Rating:
8.4 outta 10 (Over 211 votes)
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Peter (watching tv with Meg): Who needs Brian? I have you to hang with me. (Starts talking to Meg like a dog as he's pointing at the tv.) Who that? Who that? Is that a dog, is it? Is that a dog right there? Look, see, see, Meg? Go get it! See? See the dog on tv? Who's the dog on tv?
Meg (yells at Peter): I'm not a dog, you fat bastrad!!!
Quote Rating:
8.4 outta 10 (Over 163 votes)
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Peter: It doesn't matter if your family doesn't think I'm good enough for you.
Lois: That's right, because all that's important is that I love you.
Peter: No, because your ancestors were nothing but a bunch of pimps and whores.
Quote Rating:
8.4 outta 10 (Over 368 votes)
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