Peter Griffin Quotes (337 - 344 out of 362)

Peter is the head of the Griffin family household. He is one of the most typical males imaginable. He's fat, loves Pawtucket Beer, and is always there for some good physical comedy. Peter used to work at a toy factory and now we're just not sure what he does...

Lois: Peter, you're bribing your daughter with a car?
Peter: Ah, c'mon, Lois, isn't "bribe" just another word for "love?"
Quote Rating: 7.4 outta 10 (Over 463 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: Did you hear that, Lois? We're goin' to Hollywood, where the people are sexy and clever and they always say somethin' funny right before the commercial break.
Quote Rating: 7.4 outta 10 (Over 216 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: I feel terrible Brian, I put Lois in a hospital and I lost the kids. This is turning out worse than Stewie's IPOD commercial.
Quote Rating: 7.4 outta 10 (Over 186 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: Wow, when you're beautiful doors magically open for you!
Beautiful People's Club Man: Actually, it opened because you stepped on that black square.
...of course if that's wasn't there, it would have opened anyway because you're beautiful.
Quote Rating: 7.3 outta 10 (Over 196 votes) - Vote Now!

Car salesman: I'm Doug. Nice to meet you. Whoa, have you lost weight??
Peter: No, it's still there, I'm just parting it on the side.
Quote Rating: 7.3 outta 10 (Over 110 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: May the Fonz be with you
Congregation: And also with you
Peter: Let us Ay
Congregation: Aaaaaaaay!!!
Quote Rating: 7.2 outta 10 (Over 64 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: Our sex is so dull for you that you gotta fantasize about George Clooney?
Lois: I'm sorry honey, I guess that things have become a little...stale for me.
Peter: Well, I-I don't know what to do. I mean, I don't really know that much about any kinky stuff. I mean, I-I could hook this car battery up to my nipples. (Hooks car battery to both his nipples.)
Peter: Ahh, Ahh, Ahh, Oh God, Ow Ow Ow Ow Ow there's 240-Ow Ow Ow Ow Ow!
Quote Rating: 7.2 outta 10 (Over 164 votes) - Vote Now!

Peter: I'm just a big fake, like the moon landing and Marky Mark's hog in Boogie Nights and Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman. I don't mean that completely unproved gay rumor, they're just both really phony.
Quote Rating: 7.2 outta 10 (Over 257 votes) - Vote Now!