Stewie Griffin Quotes (97 - 104 out of 182)

How many talking babies do you know bent on world domination and matricide? We'd rather only know one, Stewie Griffin. From week to week he's always try to kill Lois, fighting with Brian, and deal with his farily newfound homosexuality.

Stewie: What the hell do you think you're doing!?
Lois: Strapping you in, honey, so you don't get hurt.
Stewie: "So I don't get hurt;" that's the best you can come up with, you dull-witted termagant?
Lois: I brought your Raffi tape!
Stewie: Play "Wheels on the Bus" and get the hell out of my sight.
Quote Rating: 8.4 outta 10 (Over 69 votes) - Vote Now!

Lois: Oh Good job Stewie! Clean Plate! But...
Stewie: Ye,s yes, i got more of it on my face. Yes that one never gets old.
Lois (hands Stewie a piece of cake): Here you go. Eat up.
Stewie: I'LL EAT IT WHEN I'M READY!
(Chris walks in.)
Stewie: I'm ready! Well, lets see wat we have today. Big piece of chocolate cake for me. And OH-- something very nice for BIG FAT YOU! (Hands Chris a leaf from the plant in the middle of the table.) Bon appitet! Oh and you can have my fork, i shan't be using it. Watch me. Yes that's it. (Shoves face into cake.)
Quote Rating: 8.4 outta 10 (Over 304 votes) - Vote Now!

Stewie (at airport): I require a window seat and an inflight Happy Meal, and no pickles! God help you if I find pickles!
Quote Rating: 8.3 outta 10 (Over 211 votes) - Vote Now!

Chris: Can I go now? Stewie's gonna help me with my math homework.
Lois: Chris...he can't help you with your homework, he's just a baby!
Stewie: And I guess you're a Rhodes Scholar yourself. Where did you graduate from again, the University of DUH?!?!?
Max Weinstein:I'll help you with your homework son.
Peter: My God!!! Is there nothing you people can't do, except you know... manual labor???
Lois: What a horrible thing to say! They built the pyramids!
Quote Rating: 8.3 outta 10 (Over 121 votes) - Vote Now!

(Brian walks in with injuries from being beat up by Stewie)
Tom Brady: What happened to you?
(Stewie gets Brian's attention)
Brian: I...fell down the stairs.
Stewie: Hmm, you should be more careful.
Quote Rating: 8.3 outta 10 (Over 68 votes) - Vote Now!

Stewie: Rupert, did you call that engineer at Lockheed yet? Well of course you didn't you worthless little... (Hits Rupert the Toy Bear). There, see what you made me do? Do you think I enjoy hitting you? Well actually I do. I enjoy it so much I'm going to do it AGAIN!!! (Hits Rupert the Toy Bear)
Quote Rating: 8.3 outta 10 (Over 130 votes) - Vote Now!

Stewie: Good shot! Made my brown-eye blue with that one!
Brian: Yeah, well the next one's aimed right at your head!
(Stewie jumps out from behind the tree with a rocket launcher.)
Brian: What the hell?
Stewie: Now is the winter of your discontent!
Quote Rating: 8.3 outta 10 (Over 65 votes) - Vote Now!

Stewie: Now, I'm going to do something I like to call the 'Compliment Sandwhich" Where I say something good, talk about where you need improvement, and then end with something good.
Brian: Whatever you gotta do...
Stewie (flips notepad): Something good... something good... You look like SNOOPY and it makes me smile... but you have smelly dog farts.
Quote Rating: 8.3 outta 10 (Over 316 votes) - Vote Now!