Stewie Griffin Quotes (57 - 64 out of 182)

How many talking babies do you know bent on world domination and matricide? We'd rather only know one, Stewie Griffin. From week to week he's always try to kill Lois, fighting with Brian, and deal with his farily newfound homosexuality.

Stewie (reading the Bible)" My my, what a thumping good read, lions eating Christians, people nailing each other to two by fours. I'll say, you won't find that in Winnie the Pooh.
Quote Rating: 8.9 outta 10 (Over 166 votes) - Vote Now!

Stewie (to Meg): So, umm...this is uhh..awkward but uhh..have we ever actually, you know, met? I mean I don't even know, say for example, if you have a room up there. You know? A room? I have a room. You know Meg if you kill yourself now you'll probably get a full page in the yearbook. So, umm...you know thats something to think abou..(burps)..oops just burped.
Quote Rating: 8.9 outta 10 (Over 281 votes) - Vote Now!

Stewie (to Cleveland): Can I...Can I touch your hair? I'm gonna do it...I'm gonna touch it. Ooohoohoo it's like a sheep.
Quote Rating: 8.9 outta 10 (Over 173 votes) - Vote Now!

Stewie: God, all this work keeping people from having sex, now i know how the Catholic church feels!
Quote Rating: 8.9 outta 10 (Over 186 votes) - Vote Now!

Stewie: Oh yes, you have a lot to think about: public drunkenness, grand theft auto...
Brian: You forgot the part where I made you smash your head into the windshield.
Stewie: I don't remember-
Brian: (Slams on brakes, causing Stewie to fly forward into winshield)
Stewie: Yes, well, I suppose I walked right into that one.
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 93 votes) - Vote Now!

Cleveland: I hate Bewitched!
(flips couch while Stewie is on it)
Stewie: Hey...so that's a pretty reasonable reaction huh?
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 172 votes) - Vote Now!

Robber: I'm gonna go bang my girlfriend and then I'm gonna kill Chris Griffin!
Stewie: Good lord! Can he really say "bang my girlfriend" on TV?
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 444 votes) - Vote Now!

Stewie: You know, mother, this could almost have passed for a palatable banana pudding, but without Nilla wafers it's just another one of your wretched culinary abortions. Now clean it up!
Quote Rating: 8.8 outta 10 (Over 377 votes) - Vote Now!