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PTV Quotes (1 - 6 out of 6)

Peter: Oh, Lois, you are so full of (BEEP)! WHAT?! Now I can't say (BEEP) in my own (BEEP)ing house?! Great, Lois. Just (BEEP)in' great. You know, you're lucky you're good at (BEEP) my (BEEP) or I'd never put up with ya. You know what I'm talking about, when you (BEEP) lubed-up (BEEP) toothpaste in my (BEEP) while you (BEEP) on a cherry (BEEP)Episcopalian (BEEP) extension cord (BEEP) wetness (BEEP) with a parking ticket. That is the best!
Quote Rating: 9.4 outta 10 (Over 191 votes) - Vote Now!

Quagmire: Hello, and welcome to another edition of Midnight Q. Tonight we're gonna enjoy some jazz from Charles Mingus. Norman Maylor's here to read an excerpt from his latest work. And we also have a girl from Omaha hiding a banana. We're gonna find out where. Giggity giggity. Giggity goo. Stick around.
Quote Rating: 9.1 outta 10 (Over 322 votes) - Vote Now!

The Fellas At The Freakin' FCC Song
Peter: They will clean up all your talking in a matter such as this
Brian: They will make you take a tinkle when you want to take a p*ss
Stewie: And they’ll make you call fellatio a trouser-friendly kiss
Peter, Brian, & Stewie: It’s the plain situation!
There's no negiotiation!
Peter: With the fellows at the freakin FCC!

Brian: They’re as stuffy as the stuffiest of the special interest groups…
Peter: Make a joke about your bowels and they order in the troops
Stewie: Any baby with a brain could tell them everybody poops!
Peter, Brian, & Stewie: Take a tip, take a lesson!
You’ll never win by messin’
Peter: With the fellas at the freakin’ FCC

And if you find yourself with some you sexy thing
You’re gonna have to do her with your ding-a-ling
Cause you can’t say penis!

So they sent this little warning they’re prepared to do the worst
Brian: And they stuck it in your mailbox hoping you could be co-erced
Stewie: I can think of quite another place they should have stuck it first!

Peter, Brian, & Stewie: They may just be neurotic
Or possible psychotic
They’re the fellas at the freakin FCC!
Quote Rating: 9.0 outta 10 (Over 265 votes) - Vote Now!

TV Announcer: It's The D[bleep]Van D[bleep] Show!
Quote Rating: 7.5 outta 10 (Over 213 votes) - Vote Now! when Ozzy Osbourne stopped biting the heads off of bats.
Ozzy Osbourne:Before I start I'm gonna eat this whole sandwich. (starts eating sandwich) I'll finish it later!
Quote Rating: 6.8 outta 10 (Over 245 votes) - Vote Now!

FCC Suit 1: Gentlemen, we got 20 calls about the David Hyde-Pierce incident. And as you know, one call equals a billion people, which means 20 billion people were offended by this. Needless to say, something must be done.
FCC Suit 2: Perhaps we should ask the chairman.
FCC Suit 1: Good idea. (to the chairman) Uh, sir, we're wondering what course of action you recommend regarding the Hyde-Pierce incident.
Cobra Commander (the chairman): You've got to censor television, you fools! Now, follow my orders!
Quote Rating: 6.4 outta 10 (Over 158 votes) - Vote Now!

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