General Quotes (225 - 232 out of 257)
Just because it doesn't fit into a specific category doesn't mean that it isn't funny.
Stewie (making fun of the contents of a candy jar at his grandparents' house): Oh, oh...look at this...a spare key for a Volkswagen Scirocco...they don't even make those any more! They don't even make that car anymore!! Whose keys are these?
Later...
Lois: Well it sure was nice of Mayor West to drop the kidnapping charges.
Brian: It's amazing. All he asked for in return was the key to a Volkswagen Scirocco.
Stewie: You're welcome!
Quote Rating:
7.0 outta 10 (Over 101 votes)
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Jesus: Okay everybody, for my next miracle, I'm going to turn water...into funk!
Quote Rating:
7.0 outta 10 (Over 56 votes)
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Mayor West: Today we are here to honor Joe Swanson for pulling my poor one-eyed cat Bootsy out of the old stove pipe of my Grandmother's cabin. (Guy standing behind mayor west hits him on the back of the head with a stick.) Joe Swanson won the special people's decathalon and we're here to honor him.
Quote Rating:
7.0 outta 10 (Over 101 votes)
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Announcer: We now return to "The Communists".
Father: I hear report cards vere handed out today. Vot were your grades?
Son: Uhhh...uhhh...uhhh....
Mother: Qvit Stalin and answer your father.
(canned laughter)
Mother: Go ahead, honey, and tell us your...Marx.
(canned laughter)
Son: Do I Krushchev?
Krushshev: Did somebody say Krushshev?
(everyone dances)
Quote Rating:
7.0 outta 10 (Over 123 votes)
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Stewie: So broccoli, mother says your good for me,well I'm afraid i'm not good for you!
Quote Rating:
6.9 outta 10 (Over 335 votes)
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Peter (driving through town after the hurricane): Well, at least the open air debris field is still intact.
Quote Rating:
6.9 outta 10 (Over 156 votes)
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Stewie: Oh! Oh! This story is so good, it must be fattening!
Quote Rating:
6.9 outta 10 (Over 103 votes)
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FCC:...like when Ozzy Osbourne stopped biting the heads off of bats.
Ozzy Osbourne:Before I start I'm gonna eat this whole sandwich. (starts eating sandwich) I'll finish it later!
Quote Rating:
6.8 outta 10 (Over 245 votes)
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