Top Rated Quotes (273 - 280 out of 749)
Peter: Woah! Is that really the blood of Christ?
Priest: Yes.
Peter: Man, that guy must have been wasted 24 hours a day, huh?
Quote Rating:
8.7 outta 10 (Over 465 votes)
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Stewie: Augh! What the hell do you think you're doing?
Brian: I'm cleaning myself.
Stewie: You were clean fifteen minutes ago, now you're just on vacation.
Quote Rating:
8.7 outta 10 (Over 755 votes)
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Chris: Hey, dad, look! I covered my back with honey and now the ants are taking me home.
Peter: He does the same thing at home with Velveeta and cockroaches. If you turn the light on really fast they slam him right into the fridge.
Quote Rating:
8.7 outta 10 (Over 340 votes)
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Meg: Hi, Craig. Umm, I was wondering if maybe you would want to, I don't know, go out sometime?
Craig Hoffman: Huh, that's about as likely as me playing by someone else's rules besides my own. Which I would never do. I play by my own rules, nobody else's, not even my own.
Meg: How 'bout a movie?
Craig: I don't go out with dudes.
Quote Rating:
8.7 outta 10 (Over 160 votes)
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Death: You can't tell anyone that I'm here. For if you do, the consequences could be dire.
Peter: Go on ...
Death: That's it.
[to Lois]
Death: God, what do you see in him?
Quote Rating:
8.7 outta 10 (Over 416 votes)
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Lois: Peter, wake up! Our son is covered in fleas!
Peter: That's nothing! When I was a kid, I was covered in ticks!
Lois: This isn't a competition!
Peter: It was back then. (Glances over at trophy, "Most Ticks 1965.")
Quote Rating:
8.7 outta 10 (Over 191 votes)
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Chris: I don't want to get rid of my pimple, I like him. He's my friend. His name is Doug.
Brian: I just wish I didn't have to look at it.
Chris: Well, we have to look at your ANUS all day!
Stewie:Thank you!
Quote Rating:
8.7 outta 10 (Over 457 votes)
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Peter: Come on you guys. I gonna buy us the most expensive meal we've ever had.
Peter (to drive-through speaker): Yeah, I'd like 6,000 chicken fahJItas please.
Drive-through Speaker: I beg your pardon.
Peter: 6,000 chicken fahJItas.
Brian: And a so-sahge McBiskit please.
Quote Rating:
8.7 outta 10 (Over 153 votes)
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